I stopped by Adam's house today to give him a toy truck he'd let my son play with. I'd been planning on asking for a hug since it could conceivably be the last one I'd get from him. Before I had a chance to say anything, he pulled me into a warm bear hug. I tried so hard not to cry, but I was unsuccessful at stemming the trickle. We talked for over an hour and he explained that he's normally all in on relationships too, but he'd been running with both feet "on the brakes" to keep himself from getting too far into it while he had these unresolved feelings about his breakup. He's not still in love with his ex, but he does need some closure since their relationship ended so abruptly. He also said he could see we were heading to the next step and would be meeting each others "people" before too long and he didn't want to wait the feelings out, hoping they'd go away, and have it blow up in his face if they didn't. He wanted to be emotionally selfish, but chose to be emotionally selfless and protect me instead. He thinks I'm amazing in more ways than one and I've been through hell and he doesn't want to risk being responsible for destroying me emotionally. We also have our kids to think about too. I admitted that I was easily able to see myself falling for him in the not so distant future. He's pretty amazing and I HEART him!!
I totally understand what he's saying and I left his house smiling, despite our "hiatus". His buddy was funny and texted him that he cruised by and saw my car and could he come over or should he stay away! We parted ways with a nice hug. I know we'll be back together soon. I can feel it. Plus, my part witch friend said the same thing and she's not wrong about these things...
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